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Having a routine and a daily schedule is very important to most nerds. Keeping your nerd on a schedule can help them deal with the anxiety and stress that often come with perfectionism that is seen in nerds. Nerdy kids thrive if they know what is coming next. Anything that is done at the last minute is also connected to the unknown or chaos. Having a routine helps to set clear expectations and can lead to better behavior and less stress for your child. A simple routine in the morning of getting up, having breakfast, and getting ready to go can make mornings much smoother and can reduce the number of missed buses and misplaced backpacks for your nerd.
Why a Routine?
There are many reasons to keep or get your nerd on a schedule.
Routines help kids learn to cooperate.
Routines help kids cooperate and end the power struggles by reducing stress and anxiety for everyone. My daughter cooks on Friday nights and my son on Wednesday nights so when we sit down and plan our dinners for the next two weeks, they get to decide what they want to make. If I’m running late from a meeting there are no excuses that someone could not start dinner because they didn’t know what we were having. We all know what comes next and what is expected of everyone. I have noticed that when they help with dinner, they tend to eat better. All three of the kids also help with laundry. The older two are fully responsible for their own, while the two-year-old just tries to help.
Routines help kids take charge of their own activities.
Having a schedule and routine helps kids get their chores and daily activities done without constant reminders. Nerds who feel more independent and in charge of themselves have less need to rebel and normally feel as if they have more control over their lives. Having their own planner is a great way to help your nerd take charge of their own schedule. Dated Student Planner
Routines help parents build in time to connect with their children.
My two year old knows that after a bath is cuddle time before bed. She will tell me to sit on the couch and will grab all of her blankets before she climbs up to cuddle. My older kids know as soon as the baby is down we get some “grown-up” time without the baby to talk about whatever they want. I look forward to those cuddles and “grown-up” time all day.
Routines help you (the parent) remember important things.
Routines and schedules are not just for the kids. Whether it’s ensuring your child takes their medicine every day or remembering to make that conference call every week, routines help you stay on track.
With a busy family life, you will be able to keep track of the important details by having a schedule. This will allow for a more stress-free household and quality time together as a family.
How to Create a Routine
There are three main areas that help us create a routine and keep the stress level down in our family.
- Schedule
- Checklist
- Family Calendar
Schedule
For many people who have nerdy tendencies, having a schedule is incredibly important. A schedule can keep you on time. Be sure that you are building in buffer time in case you get behind. Personally, I get anxious if I’m going to be late and I would rather not go then walk into a room late. Growing up I was taught that if you are on time you’re late but if you’re 5 minutes early you’re on time. I see this in my own kids and even in their friends who are also nerds but have not grown up in houses that stressed punctuality. Have a routine for the morning, after school, and bedtime to cut down on family stress. Daily schedules for your nerd might include:
- The time to get ready in the morning
- Bath times, mealtimes, naptimes, and bedtimes
- Scheduled housework, cooking, and cleaning times
- Playtime, family time, and outdoor play time
Adding in specific time for fun and family activities lets your nerd know what’s important in life.
Checklist
Have a checklist to make sure everything gets accomplished so your nerd is not lying in bed worrying that they forgot to do something. Checklists are a great way to help your child stick to a routine. Printing the checklist is a great way to hold your child accountable and help them feel at ease knowing that they have accomplished what they need to get done. They also cannot say they didn’t know what they needed to do if it is printed out and put on the fridge or on a Family Planning Center in plain sight. We have a checklist for after school that includes homework, pet care, and getting ready for the next day. Everything on that checklist needs to be done before any computer or video game fun time.
Family Calendar
Have a family calendar that everyone puts their information on that is visible to the whole family. Having a Family Planning Center is something that my family has found particularly helpful. We have a dry erase board for the month and each person in the family has their own color. My daughter is 14 and my son is 13 and they are responsible for putting test dates and any quizzes, assignments, or extracurricular activities up on the calendar. If it is not written on the calendar they know that it may not get done.
My youngest daughter is two so I take care of putting her doctor appointments and play dates up on the marker board. My husband and I both have our schedules up there as well so they know when he will be away for work or when I have time scheduled for working on my blog. On the side of the calendar, we have an open writing space where we keep the dinner list for the week and also a running shopping list. The older kids know if they use the last of something they are responsible for writing it up on the marker board. We use the Board Dudes Dry Erase Cork Calendar Board.
Children who grow up with schedules are able to get more accomplished and feel less stressed about completing assignments. Knowing that you’ve checked off everything on your list can help them sleep better and not stay awake worrying that they forgot to do something. Often times children who are very nerdy also have anxiety about accomplishing tasks and being on time. Having schedules and checklist will help ease their anxiety and have them feel less stressed about the next day.
Flexibility
While establishing and maintaining a routine has a wealth of benefits, it’s also important to remain flexible. Spontaneity and creativity are important factors in a child’s life. Make sure their (and your) schedule is not so packed that an impromptu afternoon swim will stress everybody out.
Remember to stay sensitive and adaptable to the needs of each child (and adult). When a schedule becomes too strict, nerds can feel controlled by it rather than feeling like they have control over their life.
Don’t forget to build in Fun, buffer time, and downtime.
Make adjustments
As the months go on, you will be able to see what is working and what is not for your family. Adjustments should be made to ensure that your routine is healthy, happy, and productive for your nerd and the whole family.
Next week we will look at how nerds deal with anxiety differently than other children. Do you know when to involve your child’s doctor?
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